If I Only Had
by Magnus Prime
Summary: After feeling left out, a certain companion vanishes...


**If I Only Had…  
** _by Magnus Prime_

The gang welcomed Nate and Nick as they returned from another salvage mission. Nate had been wanting to improve the defenses for Hangman's Alley, but had held off due to it being the main hangout for his friends. After all, most civilians couldn't handle themselves in a fight the way that people like Cait or Preston could, so the other settlements had taken priority.

Ada watched as Nate talked with Piper about something that the latter apparently found funny, if the reporter's laughter was any indication. Ever since the automatron's time with the human as he helped her avenge the deaths of Jackson and her other friends she had noticed an absence whenever he was out on one of his many salvaging missions.

She watched as Curie reached out took hold of his hand with her own. Ada knew that Curie's present body was not human in the same way that Nate's was, but she still experienced a sense of 'disconnect' as she raised her own Assaultron hand and studied it. Nate had never offered to 'upgrade' her, and she deduced that he had done so out of consideration of her person. Other than the Radar Beacon and the M-SAT, she had the exact same configuration as when the two of them met.

The whirring of the mechanisms in her neck became more noticeable as she raised her head to see Strong clap a huge hand on her hero's shoulder, and she suddenly felt…alone.

She turned to head out for a patrol around the outside of the alley and, as she caught another glimpse of Curie, her proverbial gears started to turn…

* * *

"Hey, anyone seen Ada?" Nate asked after finishing lunch with the others.

"I saw her when we got back," Nick observed, "but after that…? Sorry."

"Strong see her go out door," the super mutant grunted, pointing to the western gate. "Maybe go on patrol?"

"Hey, Dogmeat," Nate smiled as he looked down next to him. "Go find Ada? I've got a radstag steak for the good boy who finds her."

The German Shepherd leaped to his feet with an excited bark and immediately began sniffing the air.

"What smell's he going to use to track her? " Preston chuckled. "Oil?"

"I beg your pardon!" Codsworth huffed.

"Hey, if she's anywhere nearby, he'll find her," Nate said. "That nose led Nick and I all the way to Kellogg."

"I remember that," the synth said as he watched the dog's retreating form. "Amazing nose, right there."

"Maybe dog help Strong find milk of human kindness?"

Nate and Piper exchanged amused glances. The poor, dumb super mutant had milk of kindness all around him but couldn't recognize it.

Dogmeat returned several minutes later, but Ada wasn't with him.

"Did you find her, boy?" Nate asked. Since the automatron still had Protectron legs, she tended to be a little on the slow side.

His furry companion whimpered as he lowered himself to the ground and covered his eyes.

"It's not like her to take off like that without saying anything," Preston noted.

"Ah, she's probably jus' blowin' off some steam," Cait said. "We girls can get pretty bitchy sometimes."

"Speak for yourself," Piper quipped with a sideways glance at the former gladiator, who simply smirked before raising her beer bottle to her lips.

"Dumb dog can't find," the giant grunted, and got up to head over for his gear, grabbing his Super Sledge and minigun. "Strong will find."

"Thanks, big guy," Nate said, getting up from his seat as well. "I think you're closer to the milk of human kindness than you think."

The super mutant stared at his boss before shaking his head. "You make fun of Strong." With that, he headed out the western entrance to the alley.

* * *

In the end, Strong wasn't able to find the automaton, either.

"Well, we've still got a few hours until sundown," Preston said. "I don't like the idea of her being out there with all those raiders and Rust Devils either, but without any idea where she went I don't see the point in trying to look for her."

"You're pretty worried about the robot, aren't ye?" Cait asked as she laid a hand on her savior's arm. "She's just a machine, ye know?"

"Would you say the same about me?" Curie asked. "I used to be a Miss Nanny; was I 'just a machine' then, too?"

"W-Well…you're…"

As Cait fumbled with her words, Nate hid a smile behind his hand and glanced over at Macready, who was doing the same though with less success.

"You're…different, see? You've got…"

"Yes?" Curie prompted sweetly.

"Ye know who ye are!" the redhead finally blurted. "Dammit, I can't think of the word!"

"I believe Miss Cait is referring to 'self-awareness'," Codsworth suggested.

"That's it!" Cait exclaimed, thumping the robotic butler's chassis, nearly throwing him off-balance. "Ye have…what he said!"

"Self-awareness, Miss Cait," Codsworth repeated helpfully as he worked on stabilizing himself.

"And you are saying that Mademoiselle Ada does not?" Curie simply asked.

"I give up," Cait humphed, flopping back in her chair. "This is too much thinkin' for me."

As the others (minus Strong) tried to explain 'self-awareness' to the redhead, Nate made his way over to the northern gate and looked out as far as he could.

* * *

Night came, and Ada still hadn't returned.

"I don't care what time it is, I'm heading out," Nate said as he strapped on his gear. "If she comes back, send Dogmeat to find me."

"Yes, General," Preston acknowledged.

"Are ye sure ye want to go alone?" Cait asked. "I can be ready in two shakes, and-"

"Not this time, but thanks," Nate replied.

"You sure, boss?" Macready said, reaching for his sniper rifle. "You know any of us would have your back in an instant."

"Blue here can out-stealth any of us," Piper said, laying a comforting hand on the sniper's shoulder. "And his nightvision is second-to-none; he'll be fine."

"Have faith in our intrepid leader," Nick suggested consolingly. "He found all of us; he'll find Ada."

Nate smiled in gratitude as he looked into the faces of his closest friends. "Thanks guys; that means a lot to me."

"Don't hesitate to come back for one of us if you need to," Preston said as he shook Nate's hand. "Be careful out there, General. And good luck."

* * *

Unfortunately, Nate had no luck in finding the absent automatron, and he wandered back into camp heavy-hearted, worried about his robotic friend.

"Get some sleep, General," Preston ordered as he clapped a hand on Nate's shoulder. "The rest of us'll keep an eye out for her."

Nate simply nodded before dropping his gear and falling into his assigned bed. Exhaustion overwhelmed his concern, and sleep claimed him quickly and easily.

* * *

The former vault dweller woke to the sensation of being gently shaken, and he opened his eyes to the sight of his synth detective friend leaning over him. "Sorry to wake you, but there's a young woman here who claims to know you."

Nate rubbed at his eyes as he sat up in bed. "Mm'kay…give me a few minutes to wake up. Where is she?"

Nick looked over to the northern entrance to the camp. "Strong's keeping an eye on her over there. I'd suggest you hurry; he's been talking about being hungry."

Nate chuckled as he forced himself to his feet. "Guess I'd better hurry, then." He quickly splashed cold water on his face and ran his fingers through his hair in an attempt to straighten it out. "I guess I'm about as ready as I'm going to be."

He retrieved his customized 10mm and strapped it to his hip as he headed over to meet up with his guest. "Thanks, Strong," he said, clapping the super mutant on the shoulder as he stepped around him.

A young woman stood just outside the gate to camp, looking across the river to the rest of the destroyed city. Blue hair cascaded down slight shoulders, and with as short as she was Nick almost thought she was a child. "Excuse me, miss? You wanted to see me?"

She turned and gasped as her green eyes met his, and her hands flew to her mouth. "You…"

"I'm Nate; it's nice to meet you," he greeted. "Did you need something from me?"

She took a couple of hesitant steps toward him, and he raised a hand to keep Strong from acting.

She came within arm's reach of him and looked up into his face with an expression of awe. "It's…It's a pleasure to see you again, sir."

His eyes widened as the blood drained from his face. "A-Ada?"

"That robot back with human body?" Strong grunted, scratching his head.

Nate watched in wide-eyed wonder as she stepped closer to him and reached out to touch his face. "Wow…" she breathed. "It's soft and rough at the same time."

"I…haven't shaved yet," he admitted with an awkward chuckle as he studied her expressions.

She traced her fingers across his face as though trying to memorize it by touch. When he reached up to scratch his face, her gaze shifted to his hand and she remembered what caused her to go on her journey, and she intercepted his hand on its way back to his side. She lifted it up and studied the lines on his palm. "My vision has a much higher resolution than before," she said, clearly awed.

"I'm…really happy for you," Nate replied, genuine in his statement but not sure how to take in the situation.

She stepped back, still holding his hand, and appeared to take him all in with her eyes. "Sir…? Would it be improper…may I…?"

"Wh-What is it Ada? What do you need?"

She looked up into his face again, then released his hand, only to dart forward and wrap her arms around him, resting the side of her face against his chest. "Amazing…" she breathed. "You feel so warm."

"I…woke up not too long ago," he admitted, cautiously wrapping his arms around her as well.

"So, did ye find out who it-what the hell's going on?!" Apparently Cait had made her way over to the entrance in time to see her savior in an embrace. "Some strange woman shows up at our front door, and ye greet her like this?!"

"Robot come back," Strong tried to explain. "Human now."

"What's that?" Piper chimed in as she joined the audience. "Wow, Blue…you, uh…really act fast, don't you?"

As the rest of the crew gathered, Nate and Ada separated to face them. "Guys, this is Ada," he said. "She's…you're a synth now, aren't you?"

The former automatron nodded. "I…felt…left out, due to being so different from all of you. Fortunately – or unfortunately, depending on your point-of-view – another synth had been lost during a memory wipe, and so…" she spread her arms as though to present herself. "I was able to take possession of the body you now see."

"Good for you, Ada," Preston said warmly. "But…you said you felt left out? I'm sorry if we did anything to make you feel that way."

"it's nothing any of you did," she said, shaking her head then smiling as she reached up to touch her new neck. "I have wanted to interact with you the way I see you interact with each other…that's what caused the loneliness."

"Wait…you were lonely?" Macready asked. "I can't imagine a robot feeling lonely."

"When I was separated from Master Nate for two-hundred years, I found myself missing him – as well as the missus and Shaun – quite terribly," Codsworth said with definite sadness in his voice. "Miss Ada, I cannot tell you how happy I am for you!"

"Thank you," Ada replied. "I am glad to be able to be with all of you again."

"Yeah, good for you. Ye mind tellin' us why you're holdin' his hand?" Cait demanded.

Ada quickly glanced down and, sure enough, her hand had hold of his again. "My most sincere apologies, sir! I was not aware that I had taken such an action!"

"Don't worry about it," Nate said with a smile. "Hold onto it as long as you need to."

"Th-thank you, sir," she replied, color coming to her cheeks.

"Jealous, Cait?" Piper crooned as she snuck up behind the gladiator.

"Piss off," Cait snarled.

Ada released Nate's hand again to approach the group. "I…look forward to getting to know each of you again. As I no longer have built-in weapons systems, I submit myself to your instruction."

"Don't worry, Ada; we got your back," Preston said. "After we're done here we'll head over to the armory and see what works best for you."

After everyone took the opportunity to congratulate her on her new body, Ada followed Preston as he led her over to the armory. On the way, she was stopped by Curie. "I am so happy for you!" she gushed. "As you know, I was a Miss Nanny until Monsieur Nate helped me find this body."

"I know," Ada replied. "Seeing you gave me the inspiration to…follow my heart?"

"I understand," Curie replied as she waved off Preston, sending the minuteman to the armory alone. Then her smile turned coy. "And does following zis heart involve Monsieur Nate?"

Ada started to tremble, her hand finding her chest. "My…My body seems to be malfunctioning; my heart rate has suddenly increased, rapidly raising my internal temperature."

"That is perfectly normal," Cure said soothingly. "He causes my heart rate to increase as well," she whispered. "He is a wonderful man, no?"

"H-He is," Ada replied, trying to regain control of her body. "He showed so much courage and self-sacrifice, that…that…"

"Ah, my young sister," Curie cooed as she put her arm around the shorter blue-haired girl and guided her toward the armory. "You have much to learn about love, do you not?"

"That…That is true," Ada admitted. "Will you teach me, ma'am?"

"I would be happy to," Curie gushed. "But first, you must call me 'Curie'. Friends call each other by name, yes?"

"That…That is true," Ada repeated. "Then…Curie…please teach me what you know about 'love'."

"Oooohhhh, Monsieur Nate will not know what hit him!"

As she received her instruction from the veteran Minuteman, Ada found her attention divided between learning about weapons…and wanting to learn about Nate.

 _Rough Draft complete_


End file.
